At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
