Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
BRING THE BAGELS
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
