I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize