Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
