i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
