I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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