I puked a lego.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
