Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
