Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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