The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
