I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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