No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Randomize
