so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
