Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
