That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
