so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
