What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize