those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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