Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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