Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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