They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize