I have demons in me.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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