Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
