ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
