You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
