Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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