omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
