exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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