My liver just broke up with me...
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize