That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
