I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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