hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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