So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
