new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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