Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Randomize