i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
