You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
