I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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