Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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