I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
How does it feel to date your dad?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
