from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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