nut hugger
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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