There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
