Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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