but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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