just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
