i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize