Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
