you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
God I need to hump something, right now.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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