Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize